A Guide for Supportive Friendships and Families
Embarking on the surrogacy journey is a monumental and deeply personal experience for both surrogates and intended parents. As friends and family members, it’s crucial to approach the subject with sensitivity and understanding.
When I was a surrogate, everyone I told had SO many questions. Which was completely understandable. However, I wish there was more information surrounding the topic of surrogacy.
In this blog post, we’ll explore the nuances of surrogacy etiquette, offering guidance on how to support and communicate effectively with those on this transformative path.
Educate Yourself
Before engaging in conversations about surrogacy, take the time to educate yourself on the process, legalities, and emotional aspects involved. Understanding the terminology and logistics will enable you to ask informed and thoughtful questions.
Ask Permission
Surrogacy is a personal and private decision. Before delving into discussions, ask the individuals involved if they are comfortable sharing their surrogacy journey with you. Respect their boundaries and be understanding if they choose to keep certain details private.
Use Inclusive Language
Be mindful of the language you use when discussing surrogacy. Opt for inclusive terms such as “surrogacy journey” rather than potentially insensitive phrases like “giving up a baby.” This choice of language reflects a supportive and informed approach.
Express Genuine Interest
Demonstrate your support by expressing genuine interest in the surrogacy process. Ask open-ended questions about their experiences, feelings, and expectations. This shows that you care and are eager to understand their perspective.
Avoid Assumptions
Avoid making assumptions about the reasons behind the surrogacy arrangement. Infertility, medical conditions, or personal choices may be factors, and it’s crucial not to impose assumptions that may not align with the individual or couple’s reality.
Be Mindful of Emotional Sensitivity
Recognize that the surrogacy journey can be emotionally charged for all parties involved. Be sensitive to potential challenges, setbacks, or even moments of joy. Providing a listening ear without judgment is a valuable form of support.
Respect Privacy
Surrogacy involves legal and medical complexities, and details may be confidential. Respect the privacy of those going through the process and refrain from discussing specific details without their explicit permission.
Offer Practical Support
As with any major life event, practical support can go a long way. Offer assistance with daily tasks, childcare, or any other support they may need, especially during the various stages of the surrogacy journey.
Celebrate Milestones
Acknowledge and celebrate the milestones of the surrogacy journey. Whether it’s a successful embryo transfer or the birth of the child, expressing your joy and congratulations reinforces your positive and supportive stance.
Remain Open and Non-Judgmental
Keep an open mind and refrain from passing judgment. Surrogacy decisions are personal and should be respected as valid choices on the path to parenthood. Maintain a non-judgmental and accepting attitude to foster a supportive environment.
Supporting loved ones on a surrogacy journey involves embracing empathy, understanding, and open communication. By navigating surrogacy etiquette with thoughtfulness and respect, you contribute to the creation of a supportive community, fostering positive relationships throughout this transformative experience. Remember that your role is to provide encouragement and understanding, creating a safe space for those on the surrogacy journey to share their joys and challenges.
If you want to talk to someone about whether egg donation is the right decision for you, our team at Stork Baby would be happy to answer any questions you have.